When Jess tries to intervene with a classroom bully she finds herself the target of the bad seed student. Schmidt, meanwhile, is thrilled over his post-Valentine's sexcapades, but hates that his paramour wants to keep it a secret; and Nick goes into a tailspin when Julia sends him a cactus.

Jess fears she and Russell don't share the fiery passion he exhibits with his ex-wife Ouli. Meanwhile, Cece is not yet willing to admit her true feelings for Schmidt, so she encourages him to go on a date with one of her Russian model roommates. Then, a down-in-the-dumps Nick channels all of his energy into a new vegetable garden.