Lois fulfills a lifelong dream of being a model. Stewie starts on a multi-level marketing company. Brian in need of cash to buy his de-worming medication agrees to become his salesman.

Quagmire takes Peter to work but Peter messes things up, causing Quagmire to lose his job as a pilot. After not being able find another job, Peter and Cleveland make plans to help him get his old job back. When the plan fails, Quagmire receives advice from his idol, Hugh Hefner.

Peter needs a new kidney after his energy-drink addiction causes renal failure. Meanwhile, Chris is chosen to introduce United States President Barack Obama at his school after winning an essay contest. Trouble is, Meg wrote the essay.

Lois is outraged when local news anchor Joyce Kinney airs a negative profile on her.

Chris, Meg, Peter and Lois all trade places to teach each other a lesson.

Overwhelmed with financial troubles, Mort asks Peter and Quagmire to help him save his pharmacy. However, things take a turn for the worse when the trio decides to burn it down to collect insurance money

When Peter's favorite kiddie show gets canceled, he decides to create and star in his own. Meanwhile, Meg starts an internship for Dr. Hartman.

Peter talks Joe into having an affair and gets into another epic fight with the giant chicken.

When Meg learns her crush is gay and interested in Chris, she uses her brother to get closer to him.

When Stewie receives a participation medal in his school's toddler games, he begins to question everything he has ever won. Meanwhile, Peter causes a fight between Lois' parents and must repair the damage he caused.

Peter secretly gets a credit card and overspends the family money, so Lois grounds him. To plan the perfect escape, he builds a tunnel leading directly to The Drunken Clam.

Meg plans her wedding to an unexpected Quahog resident. Meanwhile, Peter finds a new vest and on one of many adventures fitting for his new attire, his arms are torn off and he is left with tiny hands that have yet to grow back.

Meg agrees to be Bruce and Jeffery's surrogate causing a pregnant Meg to annoy her family. But, when the couple fails to pick up the baby, the Griffins must take care of their new family.

Peter and Lois vacation in Florida, only to discover they've rented a condo in a retirement community. Back at home, Brian helps Stewie take his first shower.

Stewie tries to civilize his half-brother, Boston Stewie, so that he may be adopted. Meanwhile, Meg and Chris start a venture in which people online pay Chris to sit on and smash cupcakes.

Meg starts dating a chicken she meets on a reality dating show.

Chris uses Stewie's time machine to stop himself from having an erection during a book report. Peter becomes jealous when he sits out of a lottery pool and the guys win.