Maestro Harrell as Malik

Episodes 30

Pilot

75%
September 28, 201122m
1x1

Tessa and her father experience culture shock when they move out of New York and into a house in the suburbs.

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The Chatterer

63%
October 12, 201122m
1x3

When George joins the PTA, he becomes well-liked by all the moms, which has Shelia (Ana Gasteyer) feeling threatened. Meanwhile, Tessa joins the school newspaper and with some help, turns it into a tabloid-style paper.

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Don't Call Me Shirley

68%
October 19, 201122m
1x4

When Shelia's Shirley Temple doll collection is stolen, Tessa can't help but be amused, until she faces the consequences. Meanwhile, afraid of being burglarized, Dallas and Dalia stay at the Altman's house.

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Halloween

73%
October 26, 201122m
1x5

Tessa channels her inner "suburban girl" for a Halloween costume, but it ends up spooking her friends and everyone at school since she reminds them of a recently "departed" resident of Chatswin. And George is determined to prove to Halloween-hater Dallas that being scared can be fun, but gets a scare of his own when Steven Royce (guest star Jay Mohr), Dallas' husband, finally comes home from one of his many business trips.

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Charity Case

63%
November 2, 201122m
1x6

Irritated by all the cafeteria waste at school, Tessa motivates the student body to get involved with giving back. Unfortunately their charity of choice involves helping residents of Florida improve their complexions. When Tessa introduces a homeless transsexual to the student body as part of a lesson, they decide that Tessa is really the person in need. Meanwhile George receives a large dental bill from Noah, which puts a strain on their relationship.

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Sweet Sixteen

72%
November 16, 201122m
1x7

When Tessa tells Dallas that she wants a simple get together for her sixteenth birthday, Dallas convinces her to let Dalia plan the ultimate birthday extravaganza at the country club, complete with a live performance by her favorite band, specialty drinks and go-go cages. Meanwhile George throws his back out and Sheila Shay takes it upon herself to care for him, even though George is terrified of her.

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Sex and the Suburbs

70%
February 8, 201222m
1x13

Tessa enjoys rubbing it in Dalia's face that Scott Strause chose her over Dalia. However the closer Tessa gets to Scott, the more nervous George becomes. When George discovers a box of XXL condoms that Lisa has given Tessa, he becomes obsessed and starts planning game night with her friends in hopes of keeping her at home more. Meanwhile Tessa soon discovers that the more time she spends with Scott, the less attracted to him she is.

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The Body

65%
February 15, 201222m
1x14

When Tessa realizes that she's failing gym class, she decides to run for student body president in hopes of changing Chatswin High's obsession with sports. During the election, Lisa steps in as Tessa's campaign manager against Kenzie and Kaitlyn. Meanwhile, Ryan is injured during a wrestling match and finds himself mourned by his family, and George takes Ryan under his wing and introduces him to people who have moved forward from setbacks.

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Fire with Fire

68%
February 22, 201222m
1x15

When Jill turns to the newly single Dallas for inspiration and support, her marriage to Noah goes on the rocks. Meanwhile Dallas begins spending a lot of time with her hot younger boyfriend, Yoni, which causes tension with George, and Dalia befriends Lisa to get back at Tessa for dating Scott Strauss -- so Tessa decides to take action and recruits Kimantha to make Dalia jealous.

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Independence Day

67%
March 14, 201222m
1x17

When George picks Tessa up late from school she decides to get a job working for Dallas in order to buy her own wheels. Meanwhile Dallas invites her sorority sisters to stay with her in order to celebrate the opening of her store, A Crystal Cup of Crystals; however her rival sorority sister, Tulsa, decides to crash the party.

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Down Time

67%
April 11, 201222m
1x18

When Dallas's divorce is finalized, George becomes concerned and includes her in a shopping trip with Noah to buy a new mattress. Meanwhile Dalia makes a breakthrough in therapy with her psychiatrist, Dr. Richard Rohl (James Lipton), Lisa and Malik try to set up Tessa, and Ryan takes Tessa on a date.

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Hear No Evil

68%
May 2, 201222m
1x20

As George and Eden's relationship gets serious, he decides to introduce her to Tessa, who is preoccupied with her job at Crystal Cup of Crystals. Meanwhile, George and Noah make a deal regarding George's relationship boundaries with Eden, and Eden is overwhelmed by Sheila's meddling and the Werners' overprotective behavior.

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The Great Compromise

70%
May 9, 201222m
1x21

While Tessa tries to adjust to living with Eden, George takes issue with Eden's parenting; Lisa and Malik consider which camp they should attend.

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The Motherload

70%
Season Finale
May 16, 201222m
1x22

Tessa feels a void as Chatswin celebrates mothers; Dalia goes to Israel without Dallas; Eden reacts to a baby shower's theme.

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Homecoming

60%
October 17, 201222m
2x1

Tessa returns to Chatswin after spending summer with her grandmother; George finds Tessa's renewed interest in her mother threatening; Tessa signs up for the Fall Follies; Noah and Dallas compete for Carmen.

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The Witch of East Chatswin

70%
October 24, 201222m
2x2

When Tessa convinces Delia and her friends to think up feminist-inspired Halloween costumes, she attracts the attention of the Chatswin witch; Noah and George dress as each other; George misunderstands when Dallas asks him out.

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The Wishbone

70%
November 14, 201222m
2x5

Tessa decides to spend Thanksgiving in the city with her mom and grandmother; George hosts Thanksgiving dinner for Dallas.

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Friendship Fish

60%
November 28, 201222m
2x6

George starts to feel comfortable in the suburbs after Dallas gives him a makeover; while Malik is away for a couple days, Lisa decides to spend every minute with Tessa.

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Krampus

80%
December 5, 201222m
2x7

George assumes that Tessa will be thrilled to go on an excursion with her mother in New York, but Tessa finds herself missing Chatswin and her father; the Shay family is thrown into turmoil when Ryan finds out he was adopted.

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Black Thai

100%
January 9, 201322m
2x8

When Dalia receives a new car after PSAT results are released, Tessa becomes obsessed with finding out Dalia's score; Jill and Noah ask Mr. Wolfe to tutor their baby.

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Chinese Chicken

50%
January 23, 201322m
2x10

George starts to feel stifled when Dallas' efforts to promote his business go overboard; Tessa learns what life is like as a football player's girlfriend.

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Blowtox and Burlap

0%
February 13, 201322m
2x13

Tessa convinces Ryan to attend an art house movie with her on Valentine's Day; Sheila's mother, Gam Gam causes friction between Fred and Sheila; and when Dallas has a bad reaction to a cosmetic procedure, George has to enjoy an 18-course meal from renowned Chef Julio solo.

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T-Ball & Sympathy

0%
February 20, 201322m
2x14

Tessa begins dispensing romantic advice—whether people ask for it or not—though her attempt to help Mr. Wolfe doesn’t work out so well. Meanwhile, George helps Dallas coach a T-ball team; and Noah and Dallas still can’t see eye to eye.

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Stray Dogs

0%
Season Finale
April 17, 201322m
2x22

Sheila talks Mr. Wolfe into throwing a chastity ball at the high school; George buys Dallas her dream house.

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Victor Ha

60%
January 22, 201422m
3x2

Affected by empty-nest syndrome, Fred and Sheila take in a foster child; Tessa tries to disrupt George and Dalia's friendship.

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About a Boy-Yoi-Yoing

70%
March 5, 201422m
3x6

When George becomes enamored with Chatswin’s latest hotspot…a juice bar, Tessa reminds him of their pact to not get sucked into Chatswin culture. This inspires George and Fred to take a trip to New York, which doesn’t turn out the way George had planned. Meanwhile, Tessa is pressured into attending Evan’s birthday party and reveals what she really thinks of him.

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I'm Just Not That Into Me

100%
March 12, 201422m
3x7

When Tessa drags Malik and Lisa to a college party, she meets a male version of herself and becomes enamored. They see eye-to-eye on everything and it's almost the perfect relationship. Meanwhile, Dallas enlists a matchmaker to set her and Dalia up, but the matchmaker convinces Dallas to date herself and she decides to get back to basics with a new look.

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Catch and Release

80%
March 26, 201422m
3x8

When Lisa decides to propose to Malik, Tessa isn’t sure how to support her friend and turns to George for advice. After Lisa’s proposal doesn’t go as planned, Tessa steps up and is inspired to fight for Ryan. Meanwhile, George believes his girlfriend Nora might be rude to her employees

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Les Lucioles

60%
May 7, 201422m
3x12

Tessa struggles with the budget while planning Lisa and Malik's wedding; June warns Tessa to stay away from Ryan; Malik turns to George when his family decides to boycott the wedding; Sheila gives Lisa advice.

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Stiiiiiiill Horny

40%
Season Finale
May 14, 201422m
3x13

When Tessa joins a knitting circle, the age of her new friends surprises George; George writes a song dedicated to his muse; Malik and Lisa bicker.

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