Washed up and plagued by scandal, Troy McClure sees a marriage to Selma as his ticket back to success.

When Homer joins the Naval Reserve, a captain takes a liking to him and leaves him in charge of a nuclear submarine.

After spraining his knee during a basketball game, Homer begins taking care of the neighborhood kids to cure his boredom, prompting jealousy from Bart and Lisa, who feel that Homer is giving the kids the attention they never had.